6 stages of relationship development and decline

Knapp's relational development model - Wikipedia

6 stages of relationship development and decline

Child Development · Parenting While the first 6 months were great, it seems lately that things are beginning to slide. At this stage of the relationship, chemistry, both emotional and physical, is in the forefront. attraction and attractiveness, the obsessing about the other, the feelings of falling in love. Knowing which stage of relationship yours is in, you can navigate each stage without Nature designed the Romance Stage to have us fall in love. Adaptation and growth are nature's way of ensuring survival. .. Affairs (1); Communication Skills (6); Conflict (6); Divorce and Breaking Up (1); Emotions (1) . August 6, By JedDiamond. Real lasting love We all want Yet too many marriages fall apart and most people don't know why. We learn what the other person likes and we expand our individual lives to begin developing a life of “the two of us.” No one told us about Stage 3 in understanding love and marriage.

They mistakenly believe that they have chosen the wrong partner. After going through the grieving process, they start looking again.

6 stages of relationship development and decline

But after more than forty years as a marriage and family counselor I have found that most people are looking for love in all the wrong places. Falling In Love Stage 2: Becoming a Couple Stage 3: Creating Real, Lasting Love Stage 5: It feels so wonderful because we are awash in hormones such as dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin, testosterone, and estrogen.

Falling in love also feels great because we project all our hopes and dreams on our lover.

Knapp’s Relationship Model

We are sure we will remain in love forever. Becoming a Couple At this stage our love deepens and we join together as a couple. This is a time when we have children and raise them.

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We feel more bonded with our partner. We feel warm and cuddly. We feel safe, cared for, cherished, and appreciated. We feel close and protected. We often think this is the ultimate level of love and we expect it to go on forever.

We are often blind-sided by the turn-around of stage 3.

6 stages of relationship development and decline

Disillusionment No one told us about Stage 3 in understanding love and marriage. Stage 3 is where my first two marriages collapsed and for too many relationships this is the beginning of the end. This is a period where things begin to feel bad.

6 stages of relationship development and decline

It can occur slowly or can feel like a switch is flipped and everything goes wrong. Little things begin to bother us. We feel less loved and cared for. We feel trapped and want to escape. We become more irritable and angry or hurt and withdrawn. We may stay busy at work or with the family, but the dissatisfactions mount.

Different arenas for meeting allow for different opportunities to get to know each other and see if there is enough curiosity or interest to take it to the next level which would involve arranging a second or third meeting.

Knapp's Relationship Model

Curiosity, Interest, and Infatuation During the second stage, attraction and infatuation are most pronounced. Early attraction often involves the physical attributes of the partner and include things like outward appearance, body type, interests and personality traits.

Sternberg's Theory of Love: Intimacy, Commitment, Passion

Couples generally do not have much conflict at this stage of the cycle as each is really trying hard to impress the other person. For women especially there may also be a desire to figure out where the relationship is headed.

Going slowly in making any decisions about a relationship are more likely to be better ones than moving quickly unless it is clear that the relationship is not a good fit. Both halves of a couple will notice weaknesses and differences or flaws.

The 5 Relationship Stages

Some of those perpetual issues or differences such as free-spending or frugal, neat and orderly or sloppy and disorganized, interested in lots of time together or more involved in outside activities begin to emerge.

At this stage of the relationship, couples will take note of the differences and may even begin to complain or attempt to problem-solve. As intimacy develops between the two people, more self-disclosure emerges, both verbally and nonverbally as couples act in ways that are more like how they are in their daily life. This is when the big question emerges even more strongly: Pushing for an answer; however, may cause real problems in the relationship.